When expecting a twin birth the expectant father and mother initially take different routes to deal with the impending event. Mothers instinctively look for help in numerous publications or through their network of friends for women who have gone through similar experiences. Fathers act a little more.... how can I say?....... "manly" about it all. Whilst Debbie trawled through the volumes of text written on the subject, pouring over the detail of what to expect and how the miracle of twin pregnancies occur, I tended to focus only on the bits that I thought mattered.

Expecting identical twins I remember that one of the paragraphs that Debbie read out alluded to the fact that there were some indications that a high level of virility in the male can result in the incident of identical twins. Well, that was it for me. Conclusive proof of something I had suspected all along; I was Mr Supersperm. I had the sort of sperm that could travel at unprecedented speed, and with unnerving accuracy. My sperm could swim faster than an Olympic swimmer and had more stamina than even the fittest marathon runner, they could leap buildings, shatter windows and split the female egg from 100 yards. Goddamit, on a good day and given the right mood, they could probably even split the atom! I told the world and his wife about the very, very factual book packed with obvious whole truths that we had found, and even considered getting that particular paragraph made into a T-Shirt.

Oh yes, we were Mono Chorionic and proud of it!